


Can You Love a Wild Thing?

by mc_1



Category: Girl Meets World
Genre: F/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-06-16
Packaged: 2019-05-09 04:56:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 20,514
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14709489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mc_1/pseuds/mc_1
Summary: "It started the night they went to the old Cherrylane theatre to see Breakfast at Tiffany’s."When the gang goes to the movies to see the classic Audrey Hepburn flick, something happens that makes Maya begin to see Farkle in a whole new light, results in Mr. Matthews doing that whole teaching thing again, and leads to some tears because of course there are tears this is GMW we're talking about someone's got to have an emotional epiphany at some point.





	1. Breakfast at Tiffany's

It started the night they went to the old Cherrylane theatre to see Breakfast at Tiffany’s. Not one of them had seen the movie before except for Maya and Riley, who squealed and carried on with joy about how it was her favorite Audrey Hepburn movie and how they should all see it. No one could deny Riley this, especially since she couldn’t stop talking about it for three days straight. Maya didn’t object to old movies, in fact, she liked them. Back when she was little and her mother couldn't afford cable they were all that ever played on one of the few interesting channels they had access too. She would watch movie after movie when she would be home sick from school, watching the grainy black and whites with the breathless heroine and the tall, dark, and handsome male lead, the technicolor marvels from the late sixties to early seventies, full of color and colorful language (some she would try out at school, much to a young Riley’s shock). These she was used to, the rest were a little less excited as they entered the theatre late that Sunday night, wallets eight dollars lighter and mouths open a few inches wider in hushed protest. 

 

“I can’t believe this is what we’re spending our Sunday night doing. We live in New York City- there are concerts and festivals and clubs open all hours of the night and we’re here!” Spoke Zay, a little louder than he should have been. 

 

“Hush!” Lucas ordered quietly, looking to see if Riley had heard, but she was already buying snacks at the counter and out of earshot. Lucas checked one more time, making sure his girlfriend wasn’t paying attention before he continued, “I know this isn’t my first choice for what we could be doing on a Sunday night but this means a lot to Riley and besides, you know none of us could ever get into a club.” 

 

“Hey- you don’t know that,” Zay pointed, “I’ve got the moves.” He began some fancy footwork that both amused and impressed the three friends present for his little exhibition. 

 

“Well, as much as I agree that this isn’t my first choice,” Farkle piped in, “I don’t mind it so much, I’ve never seen an Audrey Hepburn movie before and it’s set in New York. I’m sure it will be cool enough just to see how much the city’s changed in fifty years” Farkle said, pleasant as could be. 

 

Maya smiled at him, approving his optimism of which neither of the other boys shared. Farkle caught sight of her smiling at him from the corner of his eye and smiled back before shifting his eyes back to whatever Zay and Lucas were arguing about now. Probably sports. Whatever it was, Maya wasn’t focusing at all on it. She was too busy dissecting why the smile Farkle had given her made her feel like, as Riley would put it, she’d been “kissed by a thousand butterflies all at once.” Maya shook her head and looked back at her best friend who was currently exchanging pleasantries with an obviously charmed concessions boy, while the line growing behind her as she chattered away looked less than charmed. That was Riley, happy as a clam in the sand. Maya, well, she was a different story. She was by no means jealous of her friend, she’d moved past that in the couple of years that had passed since that awkward and painful transition between middle school and high school where she didn’t know her place in the world or her identity. Now, Maya was confident in herself, she was happy- happy enough. Comparing happiness levels with Riley was like comparing bank accounts with Bill Gates, no contest. 

 

Her romantic life? Now that was a whole different story. That was tragic. It had been months since she’d even looked at a guy with a passing interest. There had been Lucas, and she was happy with how that ended. Lucas and Riley were like peanut butter and jelly, sweet and stuck to each other like glue. It was always meant to be, and now sometimes it made her guilty to think about how much she’d turned things upside down for them, no matter how much Riley protested the exact opposite. Riley knew her well enough to know that if she didn’t remind Maya of her total and utter innocence in the situation that she would beat herself up over it. Maya knew herself well enough to know that even if she did, that still wouldn’t change how much she wanted to kick herself because of it. Her mind was a bit of a violent place, but that was her, and at least Riley knew how to soften the blow a little bit. 

 

Then there was Josh. There wasn’t much to say about him. He was a crush, he was a fantasy. He’d given Maya her first kiss- something that Maya had still never told Riley about, she told her it had been some random guy she’d kissed at a party because she knew Riley would have been furious if she knew Josh had just kissed and left without another thought. Maya knew it was just Josh, he was who he was, and he was the type of guy who when he kissed her he did it gently, and made her feel special. Then, when he was four months into attending NYU and met a pretty girl in his Communications class that that was all for the two of them. Maya wasn’t sore though, she could see it coming from a mile away, and even though she’d learned to be more hopeful than when she was younger, that didn’t change who people were. And Maya knew that she was the kind of girl who knew what she was getting herself into, usually. Maya guessed she had more to say about Josh than she had thought. 

 

Then there was this whole- _thing_ with Farkle. What was that about? Maya couldn’t imagine, or else, couldn’t let herself imagine. Maya had always had a soft spot for Farkle, always knew he was a good guy, always knew he was the kind of guy she should try and find. But he was never _the guy_ she thought she should go after. Nor would she. She’d already nearly ruined one friendship with a guy who was split between her and her best friend, and even though Riley was in no way romantically interested in Farkle, she couldn’t challenge that promise he’d always made to them: _I’ll love you both equally, forever._

 

Forever was a long time, and Maya was not willing to challenge that. And besides, he was Farkle. 

 

But that look. 

 

Maya bit her lip, thinking of all the looks Farkle had given her, and _Riley_ , over the courseof their lives. From puppy-dog eyes to the tender, more mature, caring looks he’d given them, to the admiring, proud best-friend sort of looks. Like this look could be any different, like he would ever look at her any different than how he’d ever looked at both her and Riley. It was stupid, he was their best friend, and that was all he would ever be. 

 

Maya went to tune back into the real world before she lost herself in that endless chasm of thought and inner turmoil she called her disheveled blonde head. 

 

“So, in conclusion, sports,” Lucas said, and both Zay and Farkle nodded. 

 

Maya grinned. Maybe what he said wasn’t exactly as pinpoint as that, but it was pretty close to what she had expected to hear. 

 

“Alright, guys! I’ve got all the snacks,” Riley piped in as she came up to the group, “Milk duds for my milk dud, Lucas?” Riley said, handing the candy to Lucas. 

 

“Um, thank you?” Lucas said, eyebrows knit together. Riley booped him on the nose and continued. 

 

“Licorice for you Zay, popcorn for you Farkle, and sour patch kids for our sour patch kid,” she said, wrinkling her nose with her goofy smile as she handed her candy to Maya. 

 

“Awe, Riles,” Maya said, laughing at her sweet, earnest, but backhanded compliment. 

 

“You’re welcome, Peaches. Now, last but not least, gummy worms for me. Alright, let’s do this thing!” Riley cried ecstatically. 

 

“Gummy worms, Riley?” Farkle questioned, “I thought you still felt bad because you thought they reminded you too much of real worms and made you feel like a worm killer,” Farkle said, his face amused but sympathetic. 

 

The guys laughed, and Riley’s face turned sober as she nodded her head. 

 

“Yes, they did, but now I am learning to cope by pretending I am a bird who needs to feed her young.”

 

“Alright, as long as we’re not you’re young, and you don’t try to cough those back up later on,” Zay said mockingly serious. 

 

Riley looked shocked and defensive before Lucas told them the movie was about to start any minute, and then she was back to ol’ smiley Riley, grabbing hold of Lucas’ hand and skipping away towards the theatre. 

 

“Peaches?” She called, looking behind her and beckoning Maya to follow. 

 

“Worm-killer, worm-killer, duh-na-na-na-na-na-duh-na-na-na-na-na,” Maya sang coyly to the tune of Psycho Killer by the Talking Heads as she followed behind. Farkle and Zay laughed while Riley gave a cry, whining “Pe-e-a-a-ches-s-s” as Lucas comforted her. 

 

They sat down in the dark theatre, Maya in the middle with Riley on one side of her and Farkle on the other. The opening scene played, Audrey Hepburn dressed in a long black evening gown walking along the empty New York sidewalks, morning light pouring out beyond her. Riley gave a big sigh beside her, and Maya couldn't contain a small sigh of her own. She’d wanted to be like Holly Golightly when she was little. She had been poor and confused and scared like Holly Golightly too, and she’d wanted nothing more than a fancy tiara, a cat, and a George Peppard to go along with it. She identified with her, with her love of Tiffany’s, the same type of love for a refuge that she had for the bay window. Maya sighed again, Riley gave her hand a squeeze and they looked at one another, smiling. They had never seen the movie together, and Maya already knew Riley was going to put it away somewhere in her box of memories, the first time the two of them ever saw Breakfast at Tiffany’s together. Maya squeezed her hand back. 

 

The movie continued, George Peppard and Audrey Hepburn met-cute, they quipped and were beautiful and cool and a little sad together. The guys seemed to be taking it in well enough, however, Zay couldn’t stop from whispering to Lucas every ten or so minutes, including one important question he had early on:

 

“So wait- she’s a hooker?”

 

“No!” Riley whisper-yelled, offended for Audrey Hepburn’s sake, “She’s just a beautiful, sophisticated woman who likes parties.”

 

“And who hangs around all night with strange men,” Maya added, tossing a sour patch kid into her mouth and chewing. 

 

Riley sputtered in her seat, unable to accept anything but the very best of Holly Golightly, whose ambiguous status as a hooker was something she never picked up on all those times she’d watched it as a little girl with her mother. Maya loved her innocence, and her looking for the best in people, even if it was just a movie. After a few moments of sputtering, Zay finally dropped the accusation, unconvinced that she was not, in fact, a lady of the night. 

 

The movie continued, and Riley cried twice. Once when Holly said goodbye to Doc and again when her brother Fred died. Both times Lucas was a shoulder to cry on. Maya however, remained impassive, even though the movie brought up a lot of emotions in her. The scene in which Holly got angry at George Peppard for snooping into her life hit home for Maya, who had never liked too many questions about her own personal life either. The scene in which Holly sat crooning Moon River with her guitar in her lap also made Maya a little wistful, reminding her of all those times she’d sat at her window, looking out onto her neighborhood and the whole big wide world, singing to herself and feeling small and big at the same time. She’d always wanted a guitar, but her and her mom could never afford it. She made up her mind that if she ever did get one, she’d learn to play Moon River on it. 

 

Throughout the movie, too, Maya had been silently conversing with Farkle. First, as they both looked at each other, eyes full of laughter, at Riley’s shenanigans. Then, when Farkle quietly noticed that Maya was cold in the second act and gave her his jacket, letting Maya wrap the jacket around her and pull the hood over her head. Maya only smiled in thanks and smelled the fabric, comforted that it smelled like Farkle, like whatever woodsy soap he used. She had shifted the fabric unnoticeably closer to her, embracing it. He also pushed his popcorn into her lap without a word, letting her take as many handfuls as she wanted. Farkle knew that Maya couldn’t afford much more than the candy, and he knew she probably wasn’t going to join in on grabbing a bite to eat after the movie either, and he didn’t want her to feel hungry. He didn’t ask for any of her sour patch kids either, even when she offered. He wanted to take care of her. A couple of times their hands brushed against each other as they both grabbed for the popcorn, and Maya was embarrassed at the cliche way it made her hand tingle as they did. She hoped Farkle hadn’t noticed, and when she looked at him it didn’t seem like he did. 

 

The movie reached its end, the rain pouring over Holly and George Peppard almost as heavily as Riley’s tears fell down her face. Maya couldn’t help but feel her own eyes water as the two characters embraced, after all the turmoil, and shared one amazing kiss in the rain. It made the two girls sigh with contentment, and Maya just barely noticed Riley and Lucas share a quick kiss from the corner of her eye. She also heard Zay make something between a cough and gagging noise. 

 

Maya shook her head and turned to make a joke to Farkle when she saw that he was already looking at her. His eyes were bright with the light of the screen shining against them, along with something else, something that made her chest compress. He turned away quickly, quicker than she could read the expression on his face, and she looked back at the screen. 

 

The final notes of the score played sweepingly over the final scene as the stirrings in Maya’s chest mingled with the thoughts whirling around her head. She looked back at Farkle. His eyes were trained on the screen and his face was impassive, just a little stiff. She looked back to the screen, which started to fade away into darkness until the whole theatre was, for a moment, engulfed in it. Maya felt something move against her shoulder and turned when, suddenly, she felt a pair of lips brushing against her own, light as a feather, as brief as a summer’s breeze. Then it was gone. Maya sat back in surprise as the lights of the theatre returned, casting the whole theatre in a disorienting yellow glow. Maya could barely control her thoughts, they whizzed by her so fast they were like flies flitting around inside her head. She could barely grab hold of one and focus on it. She turned to look back at the boy sitting next to her, the obvious culprit, and saw Farkle already standing up, his back facing her, and heading for the exit. 

 

Maya became more confused than she had been even a second ago. She stood up, unsure of what to do and what had just transpired, or why it had. Her lips felt warm, and she pressed her fingers to them, trying to capture that warmth, that feeling. 

 

Behind her, Riley called out to Farkle, but he didn’t answer. 

 

“Where’s he going?” She asked, confused, but not as confused as Maya. 

 

“To the bathroom,” Maya said without a thought, covering for him. 

 

“Oh, okay,” Riley said, although she sounded a bit concerned. Probably because Maya was stood still as a statue still facing where Farkle had stood and left. 

 

“You know, that movie was not bad at all. A little weird, but, you know, I love a good love story,” Zay said, his voice breaking Maya of her reverie. 

 

“I think it’s the best love story ever,” Riley said, momentarily distracted and a smile in her voice, “Holly Golightly was scared and lonely and then she fell in love, and that love freed her from all that fear and loneliness inside her.” 

 

“I don’t know,” Lucas spoke up, his tone contemplative, “was she really wanting love? She seemed kind of afraid of it, you know, not wanting to be in a cage?” 

 

“Love doesn’t put you in a cage,” Riley said, shaking her head at him and looking at Maya briefly from the corner of her eye before looking back at him, “Love frees you.”

 

Maya felt a shakiness in her small frame that set her off ease. It had taken her a few moments to discern what she was feeling and she found only one answer: hope. A hope was being born inside of her and she couldn’t dare to name it what it was. She just stood: watching, hoping, her lips warm and her heart beating a step or two faster than normal.   
  
Could it be… did Farkle like Maya? And could it be that maybe, just maybe, she liked him too?


	2. What Does It Mean To Be Free?

The next afternoon had come and gone and it was in their last class that Maya finally saw Farkle for the first time since the night before. He sat quietly at his desk, his book and notebook already out and his eyes scanning the pages, his pen poised over his notes. He looked normal, impassive, like nothing had happened at all while for Maya she felt as though her whole world was spinning at a hundred miles an hour. She sat at her desk and tried not to look too much in his direction. 

After the movie had ended and Farkle had walked away he’d come back to meet with the group in the lobby. He’d looked totally normal, and even when she addressed him, trying to silently call him out for what happened earlier, trying to gauge his thoughts, he looked at her and talked to her, once again, normally. As if nothing had happened. The rest of the night had passed that way too. He’d even said goodbye to her, looking her right in the eye for a second, before walking back towards his apartment. It confused the shit out of Maya. 

The next morning, she’d expected to see him in the hall where they all usually met, but he wasn’t there. She didn’t have any other classes with him other than lunch and American History at the end of the day, and she didn’t see him at lunch either. Lucas said he was busy in the chemistry room working on some project, but Maya could only think with some bitterness, _‘coward,’_ as she moved the food around her tray. 

She hadn’t told Riley. It was unlike Maya to tell her about something so important but it was so strange and out of the blue that she wanted to get all the facts straight first, and give herself time to think before she let Riley in on it. She hadn’t talked to Farkle yet about it, and she knew he was the first person she needed to speak to before anyone else. Riley would flip, but Maya could deal with it. This was her thing to deal with for now, and she wanted this for her own, for some reason. 

_Damnit_ , she thought. _Why did Farkle have to do this?_ Why couldn’t he just let her be, why did he have to sneak-attack her with a kiss and far more emotion than she was ready to handle? Why did he have to leave her so confused, not even sending her a text to explain himself? She’d spent all the night before stewing in her bed, thinking of a hundred different things all at once. Most of all though, she thought about how much she liked it. It sent her fist pounding against the pillow thinking about how much she’d liked it. It was brief, but it held more electricity than the kiss she’d shared with Josh- and confused her a whole hell of a lot more. 

She replayed the scene in her head over and over again in her mind. The darkness of the theatre, the brief moment of movement she’d felt beside her, the feeling of the fabric of his shirt against her jacket probably, the confusion, and then the brush of skin against skin, lips moving against her still ones, the taste, so briefly, of popcorn and him. It makes her shiver just thinking of it. It makes her mad. 

Her feelings for Farkle, they just keep confusing her. She thought that she just loved him like a friend, cared for him like any of her other friends- maybe a little more just because he was Farkle and she’d known him since she was five. But now, now he’d kissed her and she didn’t know what he meant to her but it was definitely not just as a friend. 

“Okay class, sorry I’m late,” said Mr. Matthews, interrupting her thoughts. He dashed to the blackboard and quickly put something up on the chalkboard before pausing and quickly erasing it, instead, going to his desk to take papers out from his satchel and lay them out on the desk. The frazzled teacher looked up at the class, giving an awkward smile before asking. 

“So, uh, how was your weekend everyone? What did you do?” 

A boy off to the left in the front row raised his hand politely before beginning, “Well, I went to Nantucket with my family to-“

“Lucas and I are having a moral disagreement!” Riley cried suddenly, cutting the boy off as he glanced at her with a mix of confusion and aggravation. Maya looked to the boy and shrugged, knowing that Riley wasn’t the only one who did this and that her and her friends took up a lot of Mr. Matthews’ attention. It was generally accepted by those who knew them and was generally known as fact. The kid must have been new.  

Mr. Matthews looked pained, giving a helpless look to the boy before continuing.

“What is it about, Riley?” 

“It’s nothing sir,”Lucas said, looking like he regretted ever having said anything, ever, “it’s just about the movie we were watching yesterday.”

“It’s about,” Riley said, turning briefly to shoot Lucas a look, “Whether love can be a cage or whether it sets you free?” 

“Huh,” Mr. Matthews muttered, a twinkle in his eyes as he leaned against his desk, “What made you guys think of this?” 

“Well,” Lucas started, “we went to see this movie, Breakfast at Tiffany’s.“ 

Mr. Matthews nodded along, “I know it well, it’s a classic.” 

“Yeah- and in the movie the main characters Holly Golightly and Paul Varjak are neighbors who become friends, but Holly is a-“ Lucas was about to say hooker but was shot a look at by Riley, “a party girl, who comes from a poor background and seems to be afraid of getting tied down because she says that she’s a wild thing and that falling in love would put her in a cage. Paul Varjak’ s character tries to tell her that he’s in love with her but she refuses to listen to him. He then gets mad at her and calls her a coward because she put the cage around herself to keep herself from getting hurt. What I don’t understand is whether he was right or not. Maybe Holly Golightly wasn’t meant to fall in love? What if she couldn’t? Is it possible that love can mean losing your freedom for some people?”

“And I said no,” Riley quickly interjected before anything else could be said, “I say that Paul is right and that Holly was just scared because she’d never felt love before, and because she’s a free-spirit, and no one’s really ever understood her. I’m a feminist, I believe women don’t need to be in a relationship if they need to, but I believe in love, and I think love sets us free. Because then you’re allowed to be herself and then you can let yourself feel loved and safe. I don’t believe love is a cage, I don’t believe that you can’t love someone just because they’re a free-spirit- I can’t. It goes against all my principles.”  

Maya felt eyes on her and turned, only to see Riley looking at her, affection in her eyes. She could tell immediately that the free-spirit she was talking about was her, and she smiled at her until her eyes crinkled at the corners. 

Mr. Matthews smiled secretively and stood back up, going to the chalkboard and beginning to write with more conviction than he had earlier. The class waited expectantly to see what he was writing. When he was finished, Mr. Matthews placed the chalk down and stepped aside, allowing what he’d written to be in full view of the students. 

 

**WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE FREE?**

 

“What does it mean to be free? Philosophers and wise men have been asking this question since the very beginning. People and governments have tried to say who is and isn’t free throughout the course of history- but no one can tell you whether you are free or not, only you can decide,” Mr. Matthews said, speaking with passion and clarity, enveloping his students in the question written in bold capitals on the board.

“I choose to think that we decide what makes us feel free, and for some people, I think certain things make them feel like they’re in cages,” Lucas said thoughtfully. 

“I think people build their own cages, and I think it takes the people who care about you most to help you get out of that cage,” Riley said, her voice full of passion and emotion. 

Maya couldn’t see him, but she could tell Lucas was smiling at her. He was so in love with her, it was kind of gross, Maya thought. She smiled anyway because in a way she agreed with Riley. She’d been a cage, she was a wild thing, and Riley and her family and friends’ love had helped her get out, and now she felt freer than she’d ever felt in her whole life. 

“That’s an interesting thought,” Mr. Matthews said, “Whether you are getting yourself out of your own cage, or you have the help of your friends, what’s the key to unlocking that cage?”

“I think it’s different for everyone,” Lucas said.  
  
“I think it’s love,” said Riley.

“But love made Holly Golightly feel like she was in a cage?"  
  
“That’s because she was scared. Love isn’t supposed to make you feel like you’re in a cage, its supposed to give you the strength to set yourself free.”

Mr. Matthews was beaming at his students with pride, “These are exactly the kinds of questions I want you guys to be asking yourselves. Look inward, look around you, what are some personal cages you feel like you’ve been in? How have you gotten out of them, are you still in them? What does it mean to be free? I want you to think about these things and write me an essay about them. A thousand words, by Wednesday.”

The whole class groaned and Mr. Matthews grinned like he’d won the jackpot. 

Maya felt uncomfortable with the idea of the essay, but she figured as long as they didn’t have to share them with the class she could tell him about the cages she’d been in. From scared little girl to insecure teenage girl, to now. Whatever she was now. She wasn’t in a cage, but Maya wasn’t sure if she was really free either.

The idea was too big for her to think about right now, and at this thought the bell rang- much to her relief. As Maya put away her things and went to leave she almost forgot about Farkle until she saw him from the corner of her eye as he was exiting out the side door. _Not so fast,_ Maya thought. As much as she wasn’t excited for this conversation with Farkle, she wasn’t one to run away from something she cared about, and it disappointed her a bit to think that Farkle was the kind of guy to kiss and leave. It reminded her too much of Josh. 

She ran across the room and followed after him, Riley calling after her as she left the room. Maya would apologize to her later.

She followed Farkle through the hall and down the stairs, all the way until he reached his locker. As soon as she caught up, which didn’t take long (he wasn’t very athletic), she tapped him on the shoulder and pushed him against his locker, careful not to apply too much pressure and hurt him. She looked at him, looked at the confusion lining his features, her eyes fierce but also trying to contain the confusion and emotion bubbling up inside her. 

“What’s wrong with you?” she demanded.

“Maya, I can explain-“ Farkle began calmly, his eyes moving to level with hers. His calmness shook Maya’s resolve, it was too calm, like what she did, what he did last night, didn’t even matter.  

“Oh really? Because it doesn’t seem like you’ve been wanting to explain. It seems like you’ve been hiding. It’s like you’ve been avoiding me all day and all last night. I never thought you were a coward,” Maya said as calm as she could, bitterness piercing her last words, her emotional control almost at zero.

Farkle looked pained for a minute, then resolved, his face turning to stone. That look scared Maya more than calm. She had very rarely seen Farkle with that look on his face before. She began to regret her words. 

“Think whatever you want, for now. I’ve been meaning to talk to you though. Come by my place, at 8,” Farkle said, unlatching himself from Maya’s grip, which had loosened considerably. He turned, closed his locker, and walked past Maya, giving her a look she couldn’t read before he turned the corner towards the stairs and was gone. 

She stood there, face just on the cusp of devastated, but mostly confused. She was so damn confused nowadays. Eyes brimming with tears, she batted her lashes to push them away as she turned, kicking a locker before she walked away. 

 

~*~

 

That night Maya put on her boots to leave, lacing them up with shaking hands. She hated herself for it. Shaking her hands she tried to rid herself of all this nervous energy, and just managed to put on her shoes but couldn’t keep the tremor from her breath and chest. Grabbing her phone and her keys she walked out of her room and into the kitchen where her mom and Shawn were eating some take out and laughing. 

For a moment, she stopped and watched, her heart momentarily calmed at the sight of her tiny family. It was small, and kind of broken, but it was one of the best things she’d ever seen. 

She was quickly spotted by Shawn and asked to come join the dinner table.  

“It’s okay,” she said, waving him off, although a bit reluctantly, “Got somewhere to be.” 

Shawn nodded but gave her a concerned look.  

“Just be safe, okay. And text me when you get where you’re going, okay?” He said it tentatively, as though he wasn’t comfortable telling her what to do. 

Maya nodded and smiled, “Of course. Bye guys, love you.” She dashed out the door.  

It was one train journey and six blocks down to 54th street until Maya made it to midtown Manhattan where Farkle lived in one of the biggest skyscrapers around. It was a long journey, but it gave her plenty of time to worry- and a little time to think. But mostly to worry. 

She entered into the lobby and was greeted by the doorman, who simply nodded and opened up the elevator for her. It took 40 floors to get to Farkle’s two-story penthouse apartment. No wonder he didn’t have a dog, she thought. _It’d have piddled all over the elevator before it ever got to the actual ground._

The five minutes it took to get up to the top felt long, and by the time the doors opened Maya was surprised to see that she was already there. She walked up to the front door, which was a foreboding steel grey with a shiny silver knocker and the number 4000 on it. Maya went to knock but then heard a click and a sudden voice that nearly scared her shitless. 

“It’s me, I’m in my room. Come in, I unlocked the door,” Farkle’s voice came seemingly out of nowhere until Maya looked and saw an intercom and what looked to be a camera by the side of the door. Figures. His dad was one of the richest men in the world, it was no surprise they had so much security. 

Maya walked through the apartment, which was barely lit apart from a small lamp in the cavernous living room. Maya stopped for a moment as she walked past the floor to ceiling windows, looking out onto the vast city skyline. It was beautiful. With a view of central park and the Rockefeller building, it was better than any other view she’d ever seen of New York. 

Tearing her eyes away from the view, she continued down the hall, and then another hall until she reached the door to Farkle’s room. She thought about knocking and looked around, it was so hush in the dark hall. She decided against it and quietly opened the door into Farkle’s room. 

The room was dim, only faintly lit by a strip of lights along the edge of the ceiling, giving the room a faint glow but otherwise, it was all cast in a cool blue light, the only other lights being those from the skyscrapers outside the windows. 

At first, she couldn’t see Farkle, only the sitting area and tv to the right and the desk and bed to the left. All stark, modern, black, grey and white with hints of blue. It would have seemed utterly devoid of personality if it weren’t for the photos and school supplies and various boy things strewn around the room. Her eyes moved until she saw the hall leading to the closet and bathroom, where she saw an open door and light pouring out from it. 

A second later, out came Farkle pulling a hoodie over himself, his lanky, barely defined abdomen showing for a moment before he pulled it over himself. 

Maya felt her face heat up and hoped Farkle couldn’t see her blushing in the dark. Farkle stopped short at the bed, looking at her from across the room where she still stood at the open door. He smiled faintly. 

“Come in,” he said. 

Maya nodded and closed the door behind her. She walked up towards the bed where Farkle had plopped himself down and stood a minute, looking around self-consciously. 

“It’s okay, sit down,” Farkle said, breaking the quiet. 

“Okay,” she replied, sitting down next to him, but not too close, a few inches of space between their hands resting together on the bed. Maya looked around once more, 

“Where are your parents?” 

“They’re out at a charity event, they won’t be back till late,” Farkle said casually, “Sometimes they stay at a hotel if it runs super late.”

Maya was surprised, “I didn’t know your parents did that.”

“There are some things I don’t feel like sharing with the others,” he said, his voice soft. 

This also surprised Maya. Usually, there were no secrets in the group, everything was on the table. Or at least, it was supposed to be. She certainly hadn’t been. For a second, she wondered what the others didn’t talk about. 

“It must get lonely,” Maya said quietly, thinking out loud. 

“Sometimes,” he said, but didn’t say any more for a while. 

They sat, somewhere between a comfortable and an awkward silence, just looking out at the view of downtown New York. For a moment, if she cleared her mind, she could forget that there was anything awkward between them. She could just pretend she was hanging out with Farkle, enjoying the early evening views of the city. 

“Have you started on your assignment for Mr. Matthews?” Farkle asked, breaking her train of thought. 

Maya sighed, that assignment was one of the last things she wanted to think about. “No, I was planning on doing it later. I’ve been-“

“Preoccupied?” Farkle offered. 

“Yeah, you could say that,” she half-laughed, but it wasn’t with much humor. 

“Do you want to talk about it?” He offered, his voice tighter, a little more formal. Maya felt herself cringe. 

“No,” Maya sighed, then paused, “Yes.” She turned to him fully, looking him in the face. 

“Maya-“ Farkle ventured, his words fell apart in his mouth, stopped up his speech.

It was quiet for a moment, and Maya began to feel frustrated. It had been nearly a full twenty-four hours of this, but it felt like more. It felt like they’d been dancing around the subject for ages. She just wanted to get back to normal- or did she? She didn’t know. And as ambiguous as Maya was about most things in life, in her relationships she couldn’t stand it. From Lucas to Josh, to her dad, to every person who’d ever made her feel like she was standing on thin ice, she hated it. She would have no more. Even if it just meant being friends- she wasn’t even sure if that was what she wanted either and she hated that most of all. Even if, she just wanted clarity, she wanted to be free of all this confusion. 

She sighed, “Farkle-“ 

“Maya, I love you,” Farkle said. His words moved so fast, so much faster than she was expecting. 

  
For a moment, she thought he might have meant it in the same way he always did, the way he told Riley he loved her too. For a minute she was ready to play it off as no big deal. But then she thought, and she looked, and she _saw_.

She saw his eyes wide and clear, the same light shining in them that was there at the movie theatre, only this time they looked more determined, his brow furrowed and his jaw set tight, the muscles in his neck straining just slightly. Maya was caught by the sight of these things, by the firmness of his mouth, pressed in a resolute line that opened just slightly as her own mouth fumbled for words. He was leaning in close to her, closer than she had remembered him being when they sat down. 

Maya moved to stand but Farkle’s hand wrapped around her wrist, not pulling, but its grip firm. Maya kept still for a moment, unsure of what to do, what to think, for the moment only wondering whether to be angered by his keeping her from moving or to sit and let herself be pliable to his touch, just for a moment. She chose the latter. Her back was straight, her eyes didn’t know where to look, her wrist was still in his grip, but she didn’t feel like telling him to let go. 

“Did you hear me?” Farkle asked, his voice wavering. Maya was struck by the emotion. She was so unused to it, she wasn’t sure she’d ever heard it in his voice before. She couldn’t place it. 

Maya swallowed, her throat was dry. “I-I’m not sure.” 

He hesitated for a moment, then repeated, “I love you, Maya."

  
The feeling of his words washed over her and she shivered. Passion. That was what she’d never heard from Farkle ever before.

“You- you can’t,” she sputtered, her eyes unexpectedly watering. She glanced down and tried to bat them away, “Why would you?”

“Why would I?” Farkle repeated, his tone disbelieving, almost angry, “What are you talking about?”  
  
Maya set her eyes straight forward, unable to look at him, unable to look into herself and analyze what she knew she was feeling: scared, hopeful, distrustful, and another feeling she wasn’t brave enough to name.

“I don’t know. I don’t know anything I guess,” her voice was shaky. 

“Don’t, don’t do that to yourself. You’re smart, and you know your own mind. What are you saying, Maya?” Farkle pushed. 

Maya felt something like a wave wash over her. Tears broke over her face and trailed hot down her cheeks. “What I’m saying is, why would you ever love me- when you could love Riley? When you’ve always loved her, too?” 

“I love Riley as a friend, but not like this, Maya. Not like I love you.”

“Bullshit,” she spat, unthinking.

“Bullshit!” Farkle repeated, incredulous, “It’s not bullshit Maya, it’s how I feel. I love you, I don’t love Riley. I don’t know how to explain it much clearer.” 

Maya snapped her wrist out of his grip and pulled herself up in one motion. She stood and turned to him, turmoil in heart, it was written all over her face too. Her tears were glimmering brightly in the pale blue of her eyes and down the round curve of her cheeks. Farkle wanted nothing more than to wipe them away, but she looked so furious, so on edge, like at any moment she would swing at him. He sat and waited, letting her have this moment, letting her have the power. 

 “Explain to me how you could love us both,” she demanded, “equally you said, _equally_ \- then decide that’s not true, that you love one of us more-“  
  
“I love you both, it’s just a different kind of love. And I guess it doesn’t equal out because I love you as a friend _and_ as something more. But I kept my promise-“

  
“Bullshit!” She yelled, leaning forward, “You said you would never choose, and now you have, but what does that mean, huh? What does anything you say mean when you can take it back like that?” She snapped her fingers for emphasis, “What’s to stop you from deciding you love Riley on some other day?”

Farkle stood up, “Maya, I’m not Lucas.”  
  
Maya slapped him.

It wasn’t very hard, but he definitely felt it, and Maya sobered up pretty quick, immediately regretting her actions. 

“See?” she said, her voice weak and wavering, “See, how could you love me? After I just slapped you, after I’ve screamed at you and sworn at you and, and…” She began to sputter. 

“Maya, are you trying to test me?” Farkle asked calmly, no malice in voice. 

“I’m trying to understand…” Maya said, her voice thick with emotion, “what you could love about me? I’m obviously crazy,” she mumbled at the end. 

Farkle paused for a moment, “You want to know what I could love about you? Then maybe you need to read something.” 

Farkle turned around, going to his desk and opening up his laptop. He typed and clicked for a minute or two while Maya stood wiping away tears and trying to remember that she was supposed to be _tough_. Farkle stepped away and motioned to her. She walked over to the computer at the desk and paused, then leaned forward to see what was on screen.   

There were two word documents open, each with Farkle’s name, American History Class, and Mr. Matthews written at the top left-hand corners. The papers had different titles. One was: _Thinking Outside the Box: A Cage of the Mind_ , the other was titled: _Can You Love a Wild Thing?_ Maya stared, confused. 

“They’re both essays I wrote for Mr. Matthews essay, remember?” Farkle said, “The one on the right I started writing first, but I didn’t get very far. The story’s not finished yet. The second I wrote after, it’s just about how sometimes my intelligence feels like a cage, and how friendship and understanding help me to get out of it. It’s not a lie, but I don’t care about it half as much as the other one,” Farkle looked at her, and she looked back, unsure. 

“Go ahead, read it,” he prompted, “Whichever one you want. Although granted, one of them’s a lot more relevant.” 

Maya just barely managed an eye roll, then turned back to the computer and read: 

_In class, we were asked to write about the cages we’ve been in, whether we’ve gotten free of them, and who helped us. Instead, I want to write about a cage I want to help someone out of, my best friend, Maya. The girl I love, and also the girl who’s trapped. Maya hasn’t had the best life- she hasn’t had the best luck, and people haven’t always treated her the way she deserves. But, despite all of that, she’s the best person I know. She’s funny, she’s kind, she’s loyal, she’s smart, she’s beautiful, and above all- she’s brave. I’ve never met anyone who’d stick up for someone they’d care about as fast as she would, even faster than she’d stick up for herself. I trust her more than anyone, and I look to her for courage and for strength, as do all our friends. She’s my favorite person. Yet, despite all the people who look up to her, despite how much she’s loved by all those around her- she’s scared. She’s scared because she’s been hurt so many times, and she’s been left. She’s built a cage around herself to keep herself safe, and she’s locked herself inside with all her fears, her insecurities, and her doubts. I want to help her out of her cage, I want to use my love for her to help her out of that cage. I believe love can do amazing things, I’ve seen it. I’d like to believe that I could help her. I don’t want her to be scared anymore. I want her to feel free, I want her to feel loved._

Maya could only stare, long after she’d finished reading. She felt wetness on her cheeks, fresh and warm. She hadn’t known she’d been crying.

“Farkle,” her voice croaked softly, barely above a whisper. 

“Only you can tell me how it ends Maya,” Farkle said, coming up close to her, his hand moving to hers where it laid on the desk. 

“No one’s ever-“ she choked on her words, unsure how to proceed, unsure whether she should, “No one’s ever felt this way about me. Not like this… I don’t know how to feel.”

  
“You don’t have to say-“ Farkle paused, something holding him back, then continued, “You don’t have to say you love me back. You were right, earlier today when you said I was a coward-“

“I didn’t mean that, I was just angry,” Maya said quickly, ashamed of herself. 

“You were right, though. I was a coward. I’ve been a coward for months, looking at you, loving you… Not saying or doing anything because I was afraid of what you’d say. Then, that kiss… I had wanted to for so, so long, and I stole my chance in the dark,” Farkle said, his voice gentle, “I couldn’t even face you after, I was so embarrassed, but I knew that I needed to tell you how I feel. I couldn’t keep it a secret much longer. I love you too much to keep it a secret.” 

Maya absorbed every word, felt their weight deep in her heart, soaked them into the vessels like they were oxygen. It fed her like food. She couldn’t deny it, not to herself, not anymore. The denial was starving her, sucking on the marrow of her bones and leaving nothing else left. She hadn’t realized how much she’d hungered for this: love, his love. All those looks, all those moments of quiet where they understood each other without saying a word, all the little things they’d shared with one another and no one else, small things in passing, never big confessions. Warmth surged through her heart. It was like fire, it consumed her almost in an instant. 

“Maya…” Farkle hesitated, watching as she sat quietly absorbing what he’d said, “Now that you know, now that you know everything-” Farkle’s eyes burned holes into her, added to the fire inside her, “Do you love me?”

“I want to,” said Maya in an instant, her eyes, bright as starlight, moving to his. 

“What do you mean? What’s stopping you?” Farkle rushed, moving closer to her. 

Maya hesitated from taking a step closer, wanting to move closer too, but she stood her ground, “ _What about Riley?_ " 

Farkle didn’t answer, he only looked at her long and hard. Maya tried not to break under his gaze, tried to hold firm- but she couldn’t contain herself with the way he was looking at her. 

“I don’t want to be Riley’s replacement,” she said, her voice shaking, “I don’t want to feel afraid that you’re going to get tired of me, or leave me for Riley if she broke up with Lucas-“ Maya was talking faster than she was breathing.

“Maya,” Farkle stopped her in an instant, grabbing her face between his hands as delicately as if it were a smooth, fragile egg, not wanting her to break, “I’m never going to leave you.” 

Maya sniffed, feeling an ache in her heart which’s origins she knew so well. Staring deep into his eyes, she whispered, “People make promises every day that they don’t keep.”

Farkle’s expression rippled with sympathy, his hands moving to soothe whatever ache rested inside her by gliding along her temples, “My promise is _my_ promise. I decide what that means. And to me, that means I’d always love both you and Riley equally, but not the same. You’re the only one for me, Maya. You’ve always been. I just don’t think you’ve been able to see it, I think you still can’t see,” Farkle’s voice wavered, his eyes imploring, they burned, they begged to be wrong.

“I think I can see now,” Maya said, nodding her head, for herself and for him. And she could, she felt as though a veil had been lifted and she was free. 

Without another wasted breath, Farkle leaned forward and kissed her fully, no longer himself afraid of what he felt, enveloping her tiny frame within his own. 

Maya allowed herself to be kissed, to be held like she was precious, like she was special. _Loved_. It felt so free. 


	3. The World Keeps Turning

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little in between chapter. I'm going to have the next chapter posted soon though! :)

New York City at 2 am is quieter than one would think. At that time, anything besides the 24-hour bodegas or the bars are pretty much closed by then. The streets are empty except for the occasional ghost taxi looking for party-goers in need of a lift. The cacophony of city noises has subdued to a gentle hum. That hum had always been a lullaby to Maya. She used to stay up all night, listening to her mother crying her eyes out because her bed was empty of her husband. Because she knew it would be empty of him forever. When her mother eventually fell asleep, or after, when things were eerily quiet again, Maya would let the sounds of the streets outside her window soothe her. It reminded her that there were bigger things going on in the world, that she could someday be apart of them and leave all this wreckage behind her.

For so long, she felt like she was drowning. Swimming desperately against a current that just kept pulling her back down, back towards all that she was trying to escape. Pushing her back and back and back. Now, it seemed like life had given her a chance. Hope and love, they buoyed her. They made her feel like she didn’t have to fight so hard, like she could rest.

Enveloped in the quiet and in Farkle’s arms, Maya laid on his bed with him, the world quietly turning below her. Her head rested on his chest, laying on her side with her legs entangled in his, her hand holding his as he stared up at the ceiling flat on his back, gently playing with her hair with his other hand.

Maya had never felt so much at ease. It made her limbs go slack, her eyelids fall heavy, her lips part as she took deep breaths that collapsed into sighs of such contentment she felt shivers of pleasure roll down her spine. She was utterly defenseless, totally at the mercy of Farkle, who took a break from playing with her hair every once in a while to rub her back when she would shiver purely from contentment. In his hands, she felt as though she were some small, taut creature taken from its shell and placed in the trust of benevolent hands. It had been frightening, being drawn out from her shell- from her _cage_ , but now she felt at peace. 

Ringing caused Maya’s eyes to open, somewhat groggily, as Farkle shifted, careful not to displace her. He picked up his phone laying on the other side of the bed. Maya shut her eyes again, wanting to return to that dark, quiet world where only her sense of touch, his touch, could be perceived. 

“Hey dad,” she heard Farkle answer the phone. 

Silence. 

“Mhm. Yeah, it’s okay. I’ll be fine.” 

More silence. 

“Alright, night. Love you too, and mom.”

Silence, again. Only now, Maya couldn’t ignore what was going on in the outside world. 

“What time is it?” she asked, voice muffled against his chest. 

He gave a tiny laugh, “10:30. Why? Do you need to be home?”

“Ha,” she said, “that’s funny.” 

Farkle wrapped his arms around her tighter, pulling her closer to him. “Yeah, I guess your mom isn’t usually too worried about when you come home.”

“Yeah,” she said, her mind starting to drift away when she suddenly realized, “Oh shit.”

She sat up immediately, Farkle following after her. She frantically began looking for her phone. 

“What? What it is it?” Farkle said, concerned. 

“I forgot to text Shawn that I got here safely,” Maya said, finally finding her phone stuffed into one of her boots along with her socks and keys. She pressed the power button only to be met with black. She pressed again and again, then for longer, only to realize that her phone was dead. 

“Oh no,” Maya closed her eyes and swore at herself internally, “My phone’s dead.”

“Here, let me see if I can find a charger,” Farkle moved to get up, but Maya put a hand on his chest to stop him. 

“It’s not gonna work, my phone needs a special cable,” she said mournfully. 

“Oh.”

“It’s fine,” Maya said, thinking, chewing nervously at the hangnail on the corner of thumb, “Maybe he won’t care, he said it like it was more of a suggestion. But maybe I should go home…” 

“At ten o’clock without a phone? No way,” Farkle said seriously. He brushed a hand past his hair, looking suddenly frustrated, “I would have you driven home but my mom and dad took the town car.” 

“Oh, what a tragedy,” said Maya, poking him in-between his ribs. She rolled her eyes, sometimes she forgot how rich Farkle was, “I can always take a taxi.” 

“You can’t! A random taxi driver in the middle of the night, _without a phone?_ ” Farkle shook his head, “I repeat, no way.” 

“Okay well, what’s your plan genius?” Maya asked, irritated. 

“Do you know your mom’s phone number? Or Shawn’s? I can call one of them and ask them if you can sleep over,” Farkle said, nodding his head along with his plan. 

Maya’s eyes drifted to the bed and she didn’t say anything. Farkle questioned her, and eventually, she said. 

“I don’t know either of their numbers by heart,” she said sheepishly.

“Oh Maya, come on!” Farkle shook his head and rubbed at his eyes.

“Who memorizes people’s phone numbers anymore?! Who, I ask you?!” she cried. 

“I do!”  


“Well not all of us can have a photographic memory now can we?!” 

  
They were both silent for a moment. Then, they both began to laugh, first quietly and then falling over each other with giggles.

“I’m sorry Maya, we can’t all be so gifted,” Farkle apologized between laughs. 

Maya smacked his chest playfully, resting her head against his chest, “I’m gifted.” 

“Yes, in delinquency,” Farkle said dryly. That received another smack to the chest. “But also in art, and music, and being cute.”  
  
“Yeah, I’m pretty much a gift to humanity,” she said sweetly, her smile wide.  
  
They laughed again before going back to the situation at hand.

“Maybe you can sleep over still? I can drop you off tomorrow morning when it's early, before school,” Farkle said, “Besides, we need to get to bed early if neither of us want to be dead tomorrow at school.”

“Yeah, okay,” Maya agreed, waving off the feeling of unease at the thought of worrying Shawn- her mom could take care of it she was sure. She was so used to Maya sometimes not even coming home until an entire 24 hours had gone by. It would be fine. 

She then smiled mischievously, “So ten thirty’s early, huh? You know, Riley still goes to bed at eleven thirty.” 

“I know, I’m such a rebel, aren’t I?” he joked, waggling his eyebrows at her before getting up and disappearing into the bathroom for a moment. He came back holding with what looked to be pajamas. He held them out to her, “Here, you can change in the bathroom if you want, and there's towels in the cabinet under the sink- if you need them.”

“Thanks,” she said quietly, getting up off the bed and grabbing the clothes from his hands before scurrying off to the bathroom and shutting the door behind her. She showered, and brushed her teeth when Farkle called through the door where the extra toothbrushes were, and while she got dressed into the t-shirt that was just a little too big for her and the baggy sweatpants, she thought for the first time about the fact that this was the first time she would ever spend the night with a boy, in his bed. In bed with a boy, all alone. In bed all alone with a boy she just declared her love for- _well_ , sort of did. That was something she could deal with later. In bed all alone with a boy who just declared _his love for her_ and who she alluded to loving in return. There. Her hands began to shake again. She shook them out, hating herself for feeling so nervous. It’s not like anything would happen. This was _Farkle_ we were talking about after all. 

But maybe, maybe that was what all boys expected in a situation like this, even the good ones. Maya was decent enough at defusing these sorts of bombs at parties when the guy she was talking to got a little too _expecting_ of something. But Farkle? She didn’t think she was ready to get into that with him- they hadn’t even had the boyfriend/girlfriend talk yet. Not like the answer was that much of a _riddle_ after all that had just happened. 

Maya decided as she was tying up the drawstrings of her sweatpants that if the situation should come up, she would be firm, and she had no doubt that Farkle would be obliging.

She exited the bathroom, only to find that the lights in the room had been turned on, and the whole room was twenty times bright than it had been before. Maya blinked and spotted Farkle from across the room rifling through a cabinet by the tv stand. 

Confused, she stepped forward and saw that there were pillows on the couch moved from the bed, “Oh,” she said simply, unable to keep the disappointment out of her voice.

Farkle turned, startled for a moment, before relaxing, “Hey, I’m just pulling out some stuff- f-for the couch,” he stumbled. 

Maya’s shoulders sagged, “Awe yeah, thanks.”

Farkle turned around once again with a blanket,“Oh no, it’s not for you, it’s for me.”

“For you?” Maya started, “No way! Farkle, I’m not letting you sleep on the couch in _your own room_.” 

“Maya, you’re my guest, I can’t just let you sleep on the couch,” Farkle said. 

“Okay, well then, why don’t we just- sleep on the bed together?” Maya stumbled through what she was trying to say, her eyes looking everywhere else before they landed back on him. 

Farkle paused, looking stunned for a moment before collecting himself, “O-okay, yeah, if you’re cool with that?”

“I’m cool.”

“Me too.”

Farkle quickly put the blanket and pillows away. Maya was already in bed, covers pulled over her bent legs as she sat up against the pillows and watched Farkle come up to the bed and climb in, leaving a gap of about a foot between him and Maya. 

Maya rolled her eyes, “You can come closer, you know. We can… cuddle even, if you want?” 

Farkle nodded and began moving closer until Maya spoke up, “But no funny business, you hear me?"

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good,” she said happily and turned over on her side while Farkle turned out the lights. A moment later she felt his arms tentatively encircle her and his chin rest gently on her shoulder. She moved to let her legs intertwine with his and closed her eyes peacefully. 

“Goodnight, Maya,” Farkle said quietly.

“Goodnight, Farkle,” Maya replied, then suddenly added, “Your parents aren’t going to be mad or freaked out that I’m here, will they?”

“They called me earlier to tell me they’re staying at the hotel the charity event was at tonight, they won’t be back until after you’re back at home,” he said, wrapping up her worries in a neat little package. 

“Okay,” she said quietly, allowing herself to throw away any other annoying thoughts that were scattered around inside her brain and just enjoy the feeling of falling asleep in the arms of someone that wasn’t Riley. 

 

~*~ 

 

The next morning, Farkle and Maya woke up and she dressed back into her regular clothes. The sky outside was a dark blue, the sun barely having risen, and a chill was in the air. Farkle had the doorman call them a taxi, and sooner than she liked they were parked out front of Maya’s apartment building. Farkle kissed her goodbye, placing two extra kisses on her cheeks for good measure, something that made Maya absolutely sigh with contentment. He told her to text him when she was safely inside, and Maya said she would, then did something she had never done before except jokingly: she blew him a kiss through the window of the taxi. Farkle laughed and blew her a kiss back as the taxi drove him away. 

Maya watched, laughing and smiling as the taxi drove away. She didn’t stop smiling until she went to unlock the door to her apartment, only to have the door opened for her by- Mrs. Matthews?

Maya stood in shock as a general chorus of shock and relief rippled through the room of people. Maya’s mother,  Shawn, Mr. and Mrs. Matthews, and O fficer James all stood inside Maya’s tiny apartment living room. Mrs. Matthews grabbed Maya in a hug and pulled her into the room, closing the door behind them.

“Mom?” Maya asked with a mix of fear and confusion. 

“ _Maya Penelope Hart_ ,” her mother said in a tone that would make Hannibal cross back over the alps all the way back to Carthage. _Oh jeez_ , Maya thought, _just having Mr. Matthews in my house is making me smarter._

“Where the hell have you been?” her mother demanded. 

Maya looked around to all the eyes trained on her. She gulped, “Um, nowhere?”

_Oh, boy._


	4. Heart to Hart

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol I couldn't not make that joke.

“Where were you?” Maya’s mother demanded to know once Maya had been appropriately seated on the couch in the middle of the small crowd of people.

“Nowhere,” Maya said firmly, eyes looking straight ahead. She knew there was no way her mother would accept this but she had no other ideas of where she could tell them she was without throwing Farkle under the bus, and revealing some embarrassing details with Mr. Matthews and Shawn- and Officer James, that she wasn’t even ready to talk about yet. 

“Maya,” her mother scolded, sounding angry and hurt. Maya hated making her mother feel this way but she didn’t know what else to do. 

“Maya, please, just tell us where you were, okay?” Shawn piped in, one arm wrapped around her mother comfortingly and looking stern. For a moment, Maya felt happy because he looked and sounded so much like a real dad, then she remembered why and that joy for the most part deflated. “Look I’ve been in your position before and I know the game so why don’t you just tell us where you were, okay? I promise, no one’s going to be mad.”  

“Oh, I will be mad, I will be very mad, I am furious!” Her mother yelled, folding her arms.  

Shawn even looked scared before he replied, “Okay, so she’ll be mad, she’ll be very mad. But she’s your mother and that’s fine. We’re all just concerned about you Maya, you said you were going out _yesterday_ and now it’s 6 o’clock in the morning and you come home dressed in the same clothes, no warning, _nada_ ,” Shawn started getting madder and madder as he was talking, “I asked you to text me once you got to where you were going safely. You didn’t do that, and that’s fine but the least you could have done is tell us where you needed to stay, or if you needed to be picked up. I would have picked you up!” he yelled. 

It was all Maya could do not to burst into tears at this point, she was so shocked at seeing Shawn so upset at her. Deep down, she knew he was just concerned, but the last thing she wanted was to make him disappointed in her.  

“I’m sorry,” she said, voice thick, “My phone died.” 

“You’re a smart girl, Maya,” her mother said, shaking her head, “I know you know what to do in situations like that.” 

“I’m sorry,” Maya repeated, voice quiet as a mouse. 

“Look,” Mr. Matthews piped in, stepping forward and holding his hands up in the air in a move for everyone to calm down, “I think what we all need to focus on, with all due respect to you Katy, is that Maya is home safe now and that there is no need to file a missing person’s report with Officer James.” 

Katy sighed and nodded, “You’re right. Thank you, Cory. I’m sorry Officer James for making you come down here for this.” 

Officer James waved off her apology, “It’s fine, this is my job,” then he turned and pointed a finger at Maya, eyes firm but concerned, “As for you, don’t go running off like that again and give your poor mother a heart attack. You understand?” 

Maya nodded and said quietly, “Yes, Officer James.”

Officer James nodded and headed for the door, speaking quietly and nodding at something Mrs. Matthews said before being ushered out the door.  

“I think it’s time we get going back home,” Mrs. Matthews said gently, grabbing her purse off the coffee table. “Riley’s back home watching Auggie and probably wondering what’s going on,” she said, looking pointedly at Maya, who could barely handle another adult figure she looked up to in her life reprimanding her.  

“Of course, thank you guys so much for coming. I know it was late when I called, but I really appreciate it,” Katy said gratefully, going and giving Topanga and Cory hugs. 

“See you around, Cor,’” Shawn said as he hugged Mr. Matthews goodbye. 

“See you, Shawn,” Cory said, then turned to Maya, who braced herself, “Maya,” he said gently, “I’ll see you in school, don’t beat yourself up about this.” Then they both left.  

Maya broke out into tears after that.  

~*~  

It was decided that Maya would not have to go to school that day, as frankly everyone was exhausted and no one wanted to deal with the repercussions of the night before without at least a solid few hours of sleep. 

Maya slept for nearly four hours straight before she woke up again at ten. She padded into the kitchen for a bowl of cereal, found that Shawn and her mom were still asleep, and went back to her room, cereal in hand for another two hours of sleep.  

Her mother had to go to work at one, leaving Maya and Shawn in the apartment alone together. Maya pretty much stayed in her room, drawing or checking her phone while she heard Shawn rustling around in the apartment.  

She received a total of 29 text messages over the course of the day, impressively only 19 of which were from Riley. She got three from Lucas and two from Zay, and then one from her mother telling her they would have to talk about what happened when she got back from work. The last four were from Farkle, who was the only one she had texted back. 

_Farkle: Hey, did you make it into your apartment alright? :) - 6:18 am_

_Farkle: Hey, are you ok? You didn’t answer my text. - 7:05 am_

_Farkle: Maya, are you alright? Please answer me. - 7:56 am_

_Farkle: Shit. You weren’t at school today, is everything alright? Riley won’t stop talking about how her dad didn’t come to class today because they were out looking for you. Did you tell them what happened? I’m so sorry, I should have stayed to explain. Are you in trouble now? - 3:38 pm_

_Maya: Everything’s fine. I mean, everyone is pissed at me but other than that I’m ok. I feel so bad, I didn’t think anyone would notice really. I didn’t tell them what happened, I don’t know how. :( - 4:10 pm_

There was a ding on Maya’s phone, she looked down. 

_Farkle: I’m just glad you’re ok. We’ll figure something out. (ps. how could anyone not notice you were gone?) <3 - 4:12 pm_

Maya held her phone to her chest, feeling her chest tightening. That boy. 

There was a knock at her door. “Yeah?” Maya answered. 

The door opened and in came Shawn, carrying a bagel on a plate. He smiled awkwardly at her, “I brought you some food.”

He offered the plate to her and she gladly accepted, taking a bite, “Thanks,” she said between bites.  

He waved her off, “Nah, don’t sweat it.” Shawn remained stood there, hands on hips while surveying her tiny room and all its knick-knacks. 

Finally, he spoke up, “You know, I understand if you’re afraid to tell us where you were. I know there’s a lot of reasons you might not want to,” he eyed her carefully, “Especially if it was because, oh, let's say, you were with someone last night.”

It took all Maya had not to choke on her bagel, her eyes widening and looking away as she chewed carefully and swallowed, then taking a sip after of her glass of water beside her bed. Shawn nodded and smiled faintly as though all his suspicions had been confirmed. 

“Okay, now I get it. I should have gotten it earlier but I guess I just never thought- good kid like you, that you’d be off with some random guy-“

“He’s not just some random guy,” Maya interrupted firmly. Shawn gave her another nod and tried to contain his smirk. Maya’s mouth formed a large ‘oh’ as she realized what he’d done. She smirked herself, “Well played.”

Shawn shrugged and went to sit on the chair in the corner near her bed, “Eh, I’ve been around awhile- you start to pick up on a few things.” 

Maya nodded quietly but didn’t say anything.  

Shawn’s eyes drew sympathetic, “Look, I know that this is embarrassing, and I know I’m probably the last person you’d want to talk to about this-  

“No,” Maya interrupted hesitantly, “It’s okay. I don’t really know who else I could talk to about this… maybe I could talk to you?” 

Shawn nodded rapidly, looking hesitantly curious but still caring, “Yeah, of course. Go ahead,” he leaned forward.  

Maya began playing nervously with her fingers, trying to keep them from shaking while she talked, “I was gone last night because who I was with was afraid I wouldn’t be able to get home safe- and my phone really did die, by the way, I wasn’t lying.”

“No, I believe you. And I’m glad at least that the person you were with cared enough to make sure you were safe,” Shawn said. 

Maya nodded and struggled to keep the smile that began to bloom off her face, “Yeah, he’s really great. I went there, originally because we were talking about us, and something that happened between us- a kiss.” 

“Oh,” Shawn’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, he wasn’t so much surprised by the fact that a girl her age was kissing boys so much as that she was willing to share with him about it.  

“Yeah,” Maya continued awkwardly, “And we were talking and we just couldn’t stop and well, he- he told me that he loves me,” Maya said, smiling. She chose to exclude the kissing part this time. 

Shawn couldn’t help but smile when he saw how happy Maya looked. It brought him back to his own days when he was in her shoes- first love. “Well, that’s wonderful, Maya.” 

“Yeah, it kind of is,” Maya said bashfully. 

“There wasn’t- there wasn’t anything else that went on that night though, besides that? Right?” Shawn asked as delicately as he knew how, only managing not to completely blunder up what he was trying to allude to. He couldn’t help but cringe for asking though, hard as he tried not to. 

Maya’s face became as red as a tomato, she couldn’t believe what he was asking her. “No, no, definitely not. Nuh-uh,” she said quickly. 

“Okay, good, I mean- ya’ know. You know,” Shawn stumbled completely over his words. 

  
“Oh trust me, I know,” Maya said, causing Shawn to break into nervous laughter at how ridiculous this all was.

“Okay, well. Now that we’ve got that out of the way,” he said gratefully, “You wanna tell me who the lucky guy is?”

Maya hesitated for a moment, but decided that Shawn could be trusted, “It’s Farkle.”

“Farkle?!” Shawn cried, completely thrown for a loop, “Minkus’ kid?”

“Yes,” Maya said gravely now, more defensive than before. 

“I just- I mean, I’m shocked,” Shawn said, rubbing his beard thoughtfully. 

Maya nodded her head. She had a feeling this was only a taste of what she could expect from the others once she told them. “He makes me happy, and he loves me for me- not because he thinks I’m a rebel, or that I’m dangerous, or because he thinks I’m some puzzle to solve,” Maya spoke honestly, and for the first time evaluated why it was she returned Farkle’s feelings for her. When she said the reasons why though, she knew they were true.  

“He makes me laugh, he’s always looking out for me, he’s smart and cute, and he’s thoughtful and caring and he’s the best friend anybody can ask for- except for Riley of course, and beyond all that mastermind, genius, future dictator stuff on the surface I’ve never met anyone who genuinely understands people so well and cares for them,” Maya spoke, her mind moving towards an epiphany, “I love him. I do. I really, _really_ do.”

Maya was beaming from ear to ear, thinking about Farkle and all that had happened in the past two days and all the days she had known him since they were five. She loved Farkle Minkus. It didn’t sound pretty but it was beautiful to her. 

“Wow,” Shawn said, looking proudly at Maya, “I’m really happy for you Maya.” 

“Thank you, Shawn,” Maya said, turning to him with big doe eyes that made him want to buy her a whole new wardrobe again. 

“Come here, kid,” Shawn said, reaching out for a hug which she gladly embraced. 

They stood there for a while, gladly sharing in this wonderful moment in Maya’s life, and in their bond as father and daughter. Finally, Maya broke the silence.  

“How am I going to explain this to mom?” Maya half laughed, her voice tinged with worry. 

Shawn hated to hear her sounding upset again. He thought for a moment before saying, “You go, and you tell her everything that you just told me. She’ll understand because she’s your mother and she loves you. And then she’ll probably ground you, but that’s okay because you definitely deserve it.”

Maya laughed, looking up at Shawn and nodding her head, “Yeah, I probably do.” 

Maya sat back down on her bed, thinking. Shawn went to leave her room to give her some more time do some more of that when he heard her groan. 

“What?” he asked, bemused.  

“I forgot I have an essay due for American History class tomorrow and I haven’t even started,” Maya groaned again, her head falling into her hands. 

Shawn smiled sympathetically, huffing in amusement, “Yeah well, I know the teacher- and he’s a bit of a hard-ass,” Shawn could barely contain his own amusement, “ But if you put enough heart into whatever it is you’re writing about, I know he’ll let you pass.” 

Shawn closed the door behind him and Maya laughed, having a hard time picturing Mr. Matthews anything like what Shawn had described. However, the last thing he said put an idea into Maya’s head. Suddenly, she knew what she could write about, and it was definitely something that involved her heart. Quickly, Maya grabbed her computer, opened it up, and started writing her essay. 


	5. Jim Morrison Teaches the Class

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have one more epilogue chapter coming up, but this is the end of this story. I hope those of you who have been reading have enjoyed it! :)

The brownstones that lined the coziest looking street in all of Greenwich Village were just part of the reason why Maya loved the walk between her apartment and Riley’s every morning. There were also the trees that lined the sidewalks, their branches and foliage the markers of time passing from one season to the next, each a new chapter in their lives. The leaves had just recently started to return, new buds were forming in pearly white hues. The neighborhood was quiet and friendly, with bookstores and restaurants and art galleries and coffee shops and manicured parks that always echoed the sounds of children’s laughter. It was a place where someone could feel safe, it felt like a place where someone could be nurtured to grow. It was no surprise that this was where the Matthews lived, or that Maya thought of it as a home away from home.

Maya turned a corner into an alleyway, if you could call it that, between Riley’s brownstone and another. It was the cheeriest little alleyway one could ever picture, where garages were lined with little herb gardens and the trees grew almost as tall as the brownstones themselves. Maya did as she always did, hiking up the fire escape until she reached Riley’s bay window. She paused for a moment, as Riley wasn’t at her window or even in her room as it looked like. 

  
This was the moment Maya was most afraid of. Explaining to her mother about everything that had happened in the past couple of days was one thing- her mother had always wanted what was best for her, and knew that good things didn’t always come in perfect packages. So when she told her who she was with and why, she was sympathetic. Of course, she had still been grounded- for a week, much more lenient than she suspected other parents might have given her. Her mom understood though, herself having done some crazy things when she was young.

“We all do stupid things, especially when we’re in love,” she had said, her sweet, tired smile washing away nearly all of Maya’s guilt, “Just don’t let it get in the way of your schoolwork- a guy shouldn’t ever come before that.”  
  
“He’s Farkle mom- if anything my GPA will probably go up because I’m dating him.”

It felt good to know that her mom was so understanding, especially when she wasn’t so sure if Riley would be. Would she be forgiving? Of course. Riley could never stay mad at Maya, especially when all that caused her to be upset was because of how much she cared for her. But would Riley understand? Understand why she had to be secretive, why she didn’t go to her first for any of this, understand why she didn’t ask for help? But above all- would she understand why Farkle? Maya thought about this for a moment, and all she could think was that she hoped she would. 

Maya opened up the window and climbed through, shutting the window down behind her just as she heard the most audible cry of surprise, relief, and upset that she had ever heard. Maya turned and saw Riley at the door, her big Bambi eyes wide and watery and her mouth hanging open, before she was over to Maya in a flash, pulling her into the most violently loving hug she had ever experienced. 

“Peaches!’ Riley cried into Maya’s hair. 

  
Maya began to pet Riley’s head, feeling both tired and grateful for her little weirdo and how much she cared about her. “Riles,” she said soothingly.

“Peaches!”  


“Riles.”

This went on for some time. 

Eventually, a full ten minutes later (Maya checked her watch), Riley let go and began a full bombardment of questions, concerns, and reprimands.

“Where were you?! Your mom called my dad and told him you were missing!”

“I thought you were dead! You weren’t at school and I thought I had lost you forever!”

  
“How could you do this to me, Maya? I’m your best friend!”

Then there was a moment of silence, well, silence and the sounds of Riley taking some deep breaths. She’d really tuckered herself out. Maya waited until she had calmed down before she spoke. 

“I know Riley, I’m sorry,” was all she could manage to say. Her throat felt tight and her ring finger on her left hand began to shake. She looked down at her hands, grabbing hold of her hand and playing with her ring to busy herself. 

Riley answered quietly, “It’s okay, Peaches.”

A pause, and then, “Are you going to tell me what happened?”

Maya looked up and thought for a moment, fingers still around her ring. Finally, she looked back at Riley and held up her left hand. 

“Ring power,” she said definitively, causing Riley to perk up- she knew this was serious.

“I promise you that I will have an answer for you by the end of school,” she looked into Riley’s eyes, making sure she understood, “I promise, okay?”

Riley looked back into Maya’s eyes, saw that she was serious, and nodded. She smiled faintly, “Okay, Peaches. You’ll tell me when you’re ready.”

  
Maya nodded, her face erupting in a grateful smile and her eyes watering just a bit. _Gosh, when did I turn into such a sap?_ She thought. 

 

~*~

 

One train journey and two blocks later Riley was back to her cheery old self- although she hadn’t forgotten what Maya had promised. Maya knew that too, but she was happy to talk to Riley again like normal. 

Had it really only been three days? Maya thought. It felt like weeks. 

They ambled up to the high school and made their way to the hall where Lucas, Zay, and Farkle would be waiting. Maya’s breath grew shallow as she climbed up the stairs- not because she was struggling with the exercise, but because she worried over how she should treat Farkle when she saw him again. 

_Should I treat him like my boyfriend?_ She thought. _Maybe it would ease them into it a little- before I tell them. But then, maybe not?_

They’d be hounding them with questions all day. Maya wasn’t ready for that, it didn’t work with her plan for how she was going to tell them. She couldn’t decide, but then it was too late. Maya and Riley had made it to the hall where they saw the boys standing by the lockers. The boys spotted them and waited as they crossed over. 

“Hey, darling,” Lucas said charmingly, his arm moving to go around Riley’s shoulder as she gladly nestled underneath his arm. 

Riley giggled and booped him on the nose, nearly having Maya and Zay lose their breakfast. 

“We’re just being affectionate,” Lucas defended, hugging Riley closer. 

“I think I’m going to be sick again,” Maya said, pretending to double over. 

“Me too,” Zay quickly followed, turning around and making a hurling noise. 

“Oh, cut it out,” Lucas drawled, exciting all of Maya’s “Huckleberry” alarms. 

“Oh, yeah Huckleberry?" Maya drawled in a thick Southern accent, "Afraid I’ll have myself a conniption?” 

Lucas rolled his eyes, and Maya smiled, considering herself the champion. Her eyes fell on Farkle, for the first time paying him close attention. He was smiling wryly, watching the exchange with mirth in his eyes- they turned to her eyes the moment she looked his way and his smile widened just a bit. 

Maya took a breath and bit her lip, eyeing him flirtatiously. 

“Uh, excuse me?” Zay piped up, looking between Maya and Farkle with deep-set confusion. 

“What?” Lucas and Riley piped up, clearly not paying attention as they were busy with their own flirting. 

Maya felt her heart begin to race as Zay eyed the two of them incredulously. 

“Did you not just see that?” Zay asked. 

“No, see what?” Riley asked, confused. 

“See-“ Zay began. 

“See what time it is? It’s almost eight thirty! We gotta go,” Maya spoke quickly over Zay, causing him to glare at her. She ignored him and moved to put her arm through Riley’s own, moving her away to their first class before anything else could be said. 

“Maya!” Riley cried, then, shrugging off her best friend’s moment of spontaneity, turned her head to Lucas and waved, “Bye honey bunches!”  


Maya could faintly hear Zay go, “Honey bunches?”

They continued walking until they reached their Spanish class. The bell rang above them as they entered, making Maya sigh with relief as they entered and sat down in their seats. 

This would be a long day. 

 

~*~

 

Nearly half the day passed before she saw Farkle again. In art, she had a hard time focusing on the assignment, which was to draw a naturalistic sketch of a window with depth of space. Her mind kept turning over Farkle and what she was planning on saying to Riley, Lucas, and Zay- but mostly Farkle. It made her stomach do flips when she thought of him- something that she’d never felt for him before. Sure, she had gotten butterflies when she saw Josh or back when she thought she liked Lucas, but these were giant great big moths. Her mind kept returning back to that night when she was with him in his bed and she looked into his eyes as he grazed his fingers through her hair- she remembered how the light from the ceiling cast a cool glow over his eyes and made them sparkle. She remembered how his eyelashes fluttered- they were so long, and they made him look so sleepy and cute. And she remembered how intense his eyes looked just as he was leaning down to kiss her… 

Her reverie was interrupted by someone clearing their throat behind her. She turned, and saw Mr. Jackson standing behind her, one eyebrow peaked in curiosity or annoyance- she couldn’t tell. 

“Maya,” he said after a moment, his tone unclear, “You were asked to draw a picture of a window.” 

Maya looked at her drawing, which showed a realistic rendering of a pair of stormy blue eyes, almond-shaped, with long lashes that swept over the lid. In the background was a hazy skyline in shades of dark blue and inky black and the stars speckled across the sky. The vague shape of the Rockefeller building could be seen too… 

Maya’s cheeks colored as she saw what she had drawn. She turned and looked back at her teacher, who was still eyeing her work. She wasn’t going to apologize for it, but she was still embarrassed that she had gotten so foggy-headed. 

Finally, Mr. Jackson spoke up, “Well, you didn’t draw a window- not exactly,” he leaned forward and pointed to the tiny yellow specks of windows on the buildings, then circled his finger around the eyes in the foreground, “But this- well these are also windows, aren’t they?”    


He looked at Maya, a small smile playing on his face as he leaned back and continued, “You know what they say- eyes are the windows to the soul. But you knew that, didn’t you?”

Maya smiled up at him, “Yep, that was my plan.”

Mr, Jackson smirked, “Yes, I’m sure… You know, sometimes, when we look into a pair of eyes, I believe we look into them to find what it is we hope for most. Artists do this too, and then they draw it. What do you see?” 

Maya turned to her artwork, this time looking closer, and was quietly shocked when she saw the vague outline of a house reflected in the iris. For a moment, she didn’t know that she had meant to do when she drew that, but then, it came to her clearly. 

“A home,” she said quietly, her tone wistful, “Someone who will stay.”

Maya felt a hand on her shoulder but didn’t turn, she was too engrossed in what she drew. 

“I consider that an A right there,” Mr. Jackson said proudly, then moved to go view another student’s work. 

“Riley, what is that?” Maya heard suddenly. 

“It’s a window, sir,” Riley spoke cheerfully. 

“What’s on the ledge of that window?”  


“A purple cat!”

There was a deep sigh and then a muttering of something along the lines of “you get an A.”

 

~*~

 

Lunchtime rolled around and Maya found herself without any interest in the cafeteria pizza and tater tots she so usually mildly enjoyed. Riley spoke up about this as they moved out of the cafeteria line, grabbing bottles of water as they walked away. 

“What’s wrong, Maya? You usually love pizza and tater tot day. You always tell Mrs. Simpson it’s your favorite day of the week and then do a little dance,” Riley noted, then did a sample of the jig and smiled dazzlingly. 

Maya shrugged and sighed, “Yeah, that usually gets me extra tater tots.”

“Is it about what you haven’t told me about yet?” Riley ventured, her little face twisted in concern. 

Maya went to poke her cheek, “It’s not-“

“Hello ladies,” Farkle spoke, suddenly ambling along beside Maya as they made their way to their usual table. 

“Hey Farkle,” Riley said happily, momentarily distracted. 

“What you guys talking about?” Farkle asked pleasantly, only briefly looking at Maya before focusing again on Riley. Maybe he was wanting to play it cool for a little bit?

“Oh nothing, just something Maya promised to tell me about,” Riley said. 

“Oh really?” Farkle looked at Maya with a slight upturn of his brow. 

Maya didn’t know what to say and so instead walked ahead of them and quickly sat down at their table, facing Lucas and Zay. The two were already in a conversation that held very little interest to Maya- something about sports- and instead, she started ripping open ketchup packets and squirting them into a small mountain beside her tater tots. 

She felt the spots next to her become occupied and turned to see Riley on her right and Farkle on her left. Farkle looked back at her and smiled, then winked. 

Maya’s eyes widened. Farkle smirked at her and continued looking into her eyes, his own gaze flirtatious. 

“Okay is no one going to talk about that?” Zay said with exasperation. 

“Talk about what?” Farkle said, all of a sudden looking innocently back at him. 

“Talk about the fact that you keep making googly eyes and wi-“

Without a thought Maya slammed her hands down on the table, causing all of their trays to shake. The group all looked at her, faces confused, while Zay in particular gave her an annoyed look. 

“Really?” he said unbelievingly. 

“I forgot my napkins, dammit!” she huffed, then turned and gave everyone an apologetic smile, “Sorry, I’ll be right back.” 

She got up and left, only turning briefly to see if the table had forgotten about what Zay had been trying to say, and was glad to see that Riley had begun speaking about something rather animatedly. Her eyes moved and saw Farkle, who had his head turned to look at her. He winked again, and bit his lip to keep from laughing when he saw her give him a withering look. Maya then smirked and winked back, causing him to grin. 

“Okay seriously are we not going to talk about this?!” she heard Zay yell with absolute astonishment. 

“Zay! I was telling you about my neighbor’s bunnies,” Riley said, a pout in her voice. 

“Sorry, go ahead,” Zay said, defeated. 

Maya could barely contain her laughter as she went to grab the napkins. 

 

~*~

 

Their last class, American history. Maya had made it all the way without any of her friends figuring out what her secret was- well, except Zay, who seemed to have a sort of resigned understanding that there was something going on that he was not being let in on. Still, it was exactly what Maya was hoping for. Despite all of Farkle’s attempts to seemingly undermine these plans all day with his flirting. Maya would get him back for that though, she knew. Just thinking about it made her shiver. 

Stepping into class, everything was as it should be. Mr. Matthews was at the chalkboard, writing down the same question he had written down a couple days before. Lucas, Farkle, Zay, and Riley were all sat at their desks, chattering away before class began. Maya gave a small smile and then sat down at her desk right behind her best friend. 

Riley turned around and looked at Maya with an expectant look, “Peaches?”

“It’s coming, Riles,” Maya assured her. 

Riley smiled and turned back around, just in time for the bell to ring and Mr. Matthews to get started. 

“Alright, class,” Mr. Matthews began, clapping his hands, “I’m sorry I wasn’t here yesterday but I had some personal matters to care to.” 

There was a general look of curiosity around the classroom, only Maya and the gang looked impassive. Maya stiffened slightly but managed to keep a straight face. 

“Now today was the day your essays were due,” Mr. Matthews said, pointing behind him to the board, “This was the question you were meant to answer. What does it mean to be free? You were also supposed to write about a personal cage you felt you had escaped in order to be free, and how you did that. Did anybody help you? Or did you do it by yourself?” He paused to let what he had said settle over his students, then began again, “Now, this is not required but I’ll be offering extra participation points to anyone who volunteers to present on what they wrote about. Any takers?”

A few hands shot up, including Riley, Lucas, and Farkle. Maya was patient and didn’t raise her hand yet, she knew exactly when she wanted to talk. 

“Riley, Lucas. I saw your hands shoot up around the same time, since you two were the reason for this assignment, and you both had such opposing views on the subject, would you like to go at the same time?” Mr. Matthews offered. 

They both said yes and the two walked up to the front of the class on either side of the desk. They both looked at one another and Lucas offered for her to go first. 

“Thank you,” Riley said pleasantly, then looked at the class. “My opinion was that people build their own cages, and that love, and someone who loves you, were the only ways to get you out of one. My opinion has changed” 

Mr. Matthews nodded along, his face unreadable. 

“I had a cage I needed to get out of, I still do,” Riley said, shrugging and smiling sadly, “That cage is insecurity. I’m insecure. I’ve been bullied for who I am and what I like, I've struggled with who I want to be, and I still struggle every day in deciding where I’m going and who I’m going to be when I get there.” 

Maya’s eyes grew soft as she listened, her heart hurt a little hearing Riley talk about this. She already knew that this was something Riley struggled with, but hearing her say it so honestly in front of the class made her a little sad but also very proud. 

“I have great friends,” Riley looked at the gang as she spoke, smiling at them and them smiling back, “and a great family,” she looked to her father who nodded with a small smile, “and they are always there to defend me, to encourage me, and to help me grow. But sometimes, I still feel bad. Sometimes, I still wonder if everything’s going to be alright in the end. I worry. But I have hope… And while I have the support of those who care about me, I know this is one cage I’m going to have to get out of on my own. But the lock is starting to loosen, and I can see the sun shining through the bars. Thank you.”

The class clapped, Maya the loudest of them all. She was so proud of her friend. 

Riley beamed at the class as she was praised. Then, all eyes turned to Lucas, who cleared his throat and began. 

“My name is Lucas Friar, some of you know me from middle school, some of you don’t. What you might not know about me is that I moved here from Texas four years ago. I came here for a fresh start,” he paused for a moment and looked to Mr. Matthews, who nodded in encouragement, then began again, “I got kicked out of my old middle school back in Texas for getting into a fight to help my best friend. I was angry, but I wanted to change. I didn’t want to be angry, I didn’t want to be bitter and grow up to regret my actions. I was in a cage. I was angry and I was stubborn. But then I made some really great friends,” he looked to the group and smiled, “and a great girlfriend,” he looked to Riley, who blushed. “They taught me that I didn’t need to use my fists to win arguments, they taught me that I didn’t need to fight on my own, and above all, they taught me that love was my greatest strength. I guess my opinion changed too, because without love, without friends to show me the right path, I don’t think I would have gotten out my cage. Thank you.”

Everyone clapped, and Riley went and gave him a hug-neither Maya nor Zay wanted to gag. 

Mr. Matthews gently told them both to sit down, and he looked once again into the class, “Who wants to go next?”

Maya’s hand shot up fast, causing everyone to be surprised. 

Mr. Matthews raised an eyebrow at her, “You want to go next Maya?”

Maya simply nodded. 

Mr. Matthews nodded back and smiled, “Okay, the floor is yours.”

Maya walked up to the front of the classroom, her hands shaking. She folded them together and turned, looking into the class, her heart beating so loud she felt it reverberate in her eardrums. She took a deep breath and looked at Riley, then Lucas, then Zay, and then Farkle. All their faces looked back at her expectantly. Farkle’s eyes were glimmering with understanding- he knew what she was about to say. 

Maya gave a small smile, then started. “I’ve been lying to my friends,” she began, and Riley, Lucas, and Zay’s eyes grew wide, “and to my teacher,” she looked briefly at Mr. Matthews, who looked intrigued, “and most importantly I’ve been lying to myself.” 

“For so long, I’ve been scared and hurt because when I was a little girl- my dad left. He never even said goodbye,” Maya’s eyes began to water. “And since then I’ve been scared of loving people, and of being loved in return. I ignored my feelings for someone I really cared about, who meant the world to me, because I was scared. I was scared of love. Fear was my cage,” her eyes moved quickly to Farkle, who looked truly and utterly enraptured with her, “And now I’m free.”

She paused, took a breath, and took her first steps, “I love Farkle Minkus.” 

  
There were a couple audible gasps, and all of their friends' jaws dropped, most especially Lucas. Riley cupped her hands over her mouth, her eyes wide. Zay, although shocked, looked immediately vindicated. Mr. Matthews looked between Farkle and Maya, his mouth turned up in one corner in a grin.

Maya’s eyes looked for Farkle’s though, and in them, she saw a look that she would never quite forget. His eyes were tender, passionate, and even grateful. There was a gleam to them that could not have been ignored, and his eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled at her. He mouthed something: _I love you, too._ Maya’s heart soared, and she only just managed to continue with her project. 

“I love him, and I’ve loved him for a while. I couldn’t admit it, because I couldn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe that I could love and be loved in that same way I’d always wished I’d seen my parents. But, things change. My mother met a man who is good to her, who loves her like she deserves, and when she goes to sleep at night, she’s at peace. It’s the peace you feel when you’re free. Free from loneliness, from sorrow, from wishing for brighter days that you feel like will never come. That day did come though, my cage door unlocked, and now I’m not scared anymore. Thank you.”

There was clapping for Maya, and there was also cheering from her friends, who all stood to embrace Maya. 

Riley was the first to pull her into a hug, which Maya gladly embraced. 

“I’m so happy for you, Maya,” she whispered into her ear, her voice watery. 

Maya felt her own tears fall and she smiled against Riley’s hair, “Thank you.”

Once disengaged, Maya received a hug from Lucas, and one from Zay, who both congratulated her. 

“I’m really glad for you Maya," Lucas said, grinning ear to ear, then turning to look off to the side, "and you too Farkle."

“I knew it,” Zay said, then smiled. 

Finally, she turned to Farkle, who grabbed her as soon as he could and wrapped her into a hug. There were awes and a couple of ceremonious retching noises from Zay to gladly celebrate their new relationship. 

Maya looked up at Farkle, her eyes radiant and loving. 

“I’m glad you went first,” Farkle said, humor in his voice, “I decided on the other essay last minute.”

Maya punched him in the chest, just hard enough to get a soft “oof” out of him. She laughed, and he did too, pulling her once again into his now sore chest for a hug. 

“Alright you kids, sit down,” Mr. Matthews spoke, his voice tough but affectionate, “This is still a classroom after all.” 

“There’s only ten minutes left, sir,” Farkle countered, although he and Maya had already parted. 

“Yeah, and I plan to make good use of them, sit down,” Mr. Matthews replied playfully, moving to stand in front of his desk. 

He looked over his students as Farkle and Maya sat down, eyeing them all with a mix of pride and affection. 

“You just heard three people speak. Three stories. Three cages that they’ve struggled with. What did they all have in common?”

“They all were about love, about the people you care about,” Lucas spoke up. 

“True,” Mr. Matthews said, “What else?”

Farkle raised his hand.

“Farkle?”

“Everybody learned something about themselves,” he said, referring to himself as well. 

“Exactly,” Mr. Matthews said, and then went up to write on the board. The class watched and waited as he wrote underneath the question that started it all. He moved aside to reveal what he had written. 

 

**“The most important kind of freedom is to be what you really are.”**

 

“There can’t be any large-scale revolution until there’s a personal revolution, on an individual level. It’s got to happen inside first,” Mr. Matthews pointed to his chest, his eyes scanning over his students' faces. “Can anyone tell me who said this?” 

“Gandhi, sir?” inquired Lucas.

“No, Jim Morrison,” Mr. Matthews said, making Lucas' face scrunch up in confusion. 

“He understood, as you all have learned, that to be free means to look inside yourself, to see what’s keeping you locked in your cage. When you discover what that is, whether you need the help of the ones you love,” he looked at Lucas, “or you need to learn to help yourself,” he looked at Riley, “once you call it by its name, you can start to let it go. You can begin to heal,” he looked to Maya, who smiled. 

Mr. Matthews raised his arm, pointing at Maya. 

“You,” he said. 

“Fear,” she said simply. 

“You,” he pointed to Lucas. 

“Anger.”

“You,” he pointed to Riley. 

“Insecurity.” 

“You,” he pointed to Farkle. 

“Fear, too,” he said, his head turning to look at Maya. Their eyes met and they looked at each other with a look that spoke of love and understanding. 

“Very good,” Mr. Matthews said proudly, eyes crinkling at the corners as he smiled, “Class dismissed.” 


	6. The First, The Last Dance

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the last chapter. Thank you for the kind comments and kudos!

“Maya and Farkle?”

“Mhm.”

  
“Maya Hart and Farkle Minkus?”

“Mhm.” 

“Those two an item?”

“I know!” 

  
“I knew it all along.”

  
“You did not!”

Cory and Topanga stood in their kitchen, thinking about the unpredictability of life, love, and above all- teenagers. 

“You know what this means, right?” Topanga asked, already thinking ten steps into the future while Cory was trying to figure out whether this meant he shouldn’t let Farkle into his daughter’s room anymore. 

“Nah, let her father worry about it,” said Cory aloud, smirking and thinking of Shawn. 

“What?” 

“Oh, nothing, nothing. What were you saying?”

Topanga raised an eyebrow at him but continued, “You know what this means, right?”

Cory stood for a moment in thought, then quickly shook his head.

Topanga smiled. _Of course, he didn’t_ , she thought. 

“Double dates, drama, and of course- dances,” she said smiling, a mischievous glint in her eye. 

“No!” Cory shouted, his head already aching at all the events he’d have to chaperone- watching out for _two_ couples canoodling.  


“Oh yes, Cor. It’s going to happen sooner than you think.” 

Cory looked mournful, then sighed, rubbing his forehead before speaking, “Well, it had to happen eventually.”  


“I know,” Topanga said, moving behind her husband to rest her hands on his shoulders, “And its good that its Farkle, someone we can trust.”

Cory nodded, then, hesitant but curious asked, “Did you really know that they liked each other?”

Topanga grinned in victory, “I had my suspicions,” she said, then began to consider all the signs, “It’s gotten more obvious as time has gone by- I don’t think either of them really knew for themselves until a few months ago, but I saw how they got along. They’re more compatible than you think.”  
  
“They are?” Cory asked, perplexed, then thought about it a little more and his face opened up into an expression of wonder, “They are!”  
  
“They’re both strong-willed, thoughtful, skeptical people- they might take over the world someday.”

“They might take over the world someday,” Cory repeated, his face and tone denoting the absolute fear in his heart at that very real sounding possibility. 

Topanga laughed, “Well, I think they might do something really wonderful with it.”

 Cory relaxed and smiled, looking thoughtfully at Topanga, “Yeah, me too. We did.”

 The couple stared lovingly at each other, something that was only broken when the front door burst open and in walked a very excited Riley and Maya. 

“Homecoming! They just announced when homecoming is!” Riley shouted with glee, a quieter but equally excited Maya behind her.  

“Oh no,” Cory said, his head turning back to his wife with accusation in his eyes, “You did this!”

Topanga rolled her eyes and patted him on the back, then went over to the girls to start talking about dresses three weeks in advance.  

Cory took out his wallet and held it out in front of him. He kissed it, “Goodbye old friend.”

 

~*~

 

Cory and Topanga stood waiting in the living room, almost as excited as the kids about the night’s upcoming festivities. Despite his complaints, Cory was very excited to see his daughter all dressed up on her big night, which he would also be chaperoning and watching her like a hawk. Dresses had been bought, corsages coordinated, and meltdowns over hair had already occurred an hour beforehand- they were all ready.  

The doorbell rang, and Topanga and Cory looked at one another gleefully as Topanga went to open the door. On the other side were Lucas, Farkle, and Zay all looking very smart in their suits. Lucas looked prim, proper and charming in a navy suit and black tie, Zay had dressed with a little more flair in a burgundy suit and a white button up, a patterned pocket square in his lapel, and Farkle looked incredibly well put together in an all-black three-piece suit.  

“You guys look amazing!” Topanga said, ushering them in, “And Farkle! I didn’t know you could clean up so well- no offense.” 

Farkle shrugged and pulled at his tie, smirking to himself, “Yeah, my parents take me to events sometimes so I sort of have to know how to dress like this.”

“Well you look very dapper, all of you do,” Topanga said then suddenly pulled out her phone and ordered, “Alright, now say cheese!”

The boys hustled together and posed for the camera. Topanga took many, many photos, and had been taking them since she took the girls to go get their makeup done. Satisfied, she looked at the time on her phone and gasped. 

“It’s nearly 8, the dance starts in half an hour. We got to get you guys out of here!” she then went towards Riley’s bedroom door and called for the girls. It took five more minutes before the girls actually left the room, and Topanga was poised and ready when they entered into view, causing many a jaw to drop. 

Riley entered the room beaming from ear to ear, dressed very soft and pretty in a cream colored dress, the short skirt made of tulle and the off the shoulder neckline dotted with lace and faux pearls, a matching pearl pin holding up half her hair. She looked every bit the perfect partner for her date, who looked at her with a grin on his face. 

Maya smiled shyly and looked very elegant in black satin, the v-shaped neck highlighting her length of neck and delicate collar bones and the a-line skirt fitted at the waist, making her look very feminine. In her ears were a pair of very expensive looking pearl earrings, her hair held back in a loose bun to show them off. It was Farkle who had given her the earrings, a present he thought would be even better than a corsage, which Maya didn’t want. He stared at her with a thoughtful expression, his eyes soft as he watched Maya stand shyly before him. 

“Come down here so I can look at you better,” he said boldly, holding out his hand for her to take.  

Maya walked carefully down the steps and grabbed his waiting hand, letting herself be tugged gently a little closer towards him. He didn’t let go of her hand as he examined her. Maya felt shaky being held so closely under his gaze, but her shaking hand was steadied by his calm one. 

“You look beautiful, Maya,” he said, his eyes boring into hers, his other hand went to cup her cheek, he looked briefly to the side of her face and smiled, “Those earrings look beautiful on you too.” 

Maya’s gaze fell down to her feet, she blushed, her cheeks turning even pinker than the blush she was wearing, “Yeah, well, you know…” she said, at a loss for words, no sassy comeback this time. Then she looked back up at him, allowing herself to actually enjoy this moment, “Thank you, Farkle.”  


“If it gets you to smile like that, I’ll buy you twenty more,” Farkle said, even with a grin on his face he sounded serious.

Maya blanched, “No, no way,” she then thought a moment and relaxed, a small smile formed on her face, “I don’t need jewelry to make me smile, that’s why I have you.”

Farkle beamed and Maya stood on her toes to give him a kiss on the tip of his nose. 

“Awwwwwww,” cried Riley, who when they turned looked as though she was going to fall over from excitement. Lucas moved behind her and steadied her by holding both her arms, just in case. 

“Mr. Matthews, are you crying?” asked Zay incredulously.   
  
Everyone turned to see Cory standing by the kitchen, tears streaming down his face.

“No!” he said, in obvious denial, quickly wiping tears away. 

“You didn’t cry when me and Lucas saw each other,” Riley said, her little face in a bit of a pout.

“Awe, you guys are old news,” Cory waved them off, and Riley and Lucas both looked offended before Topanga stepped forward quickly. 

“You’re dance is in twenty-five minutes and I only have two hundred photos, I need at least three hundred more, now stand by the door and look happy,” Topanga commanded, pointing where they were supposed to stand. 

“Yes ma'am,” said everyone, including Cory. 

The group took their photos, sans Cory, and then he managed to jump into one photo before getting chastised by the teenagers. 

“Alright, everyone, let’s go!” Cory cried, sounding more excited than the kids. 

Two by two, first Riley and Lucas, then Maya and Farkle exited out the door, each hand in hand. Zay and Cory looked at one another. Cory held out his hand. 

“Dude, I have a date,” Zay rebuffed him, looking disgruntled as he walked out the door.  

Cory looked at Topanga sadly, she smirked at him. 

“It’s like the fifth-grade dance all over again,” she mocked.  

“Brenda Daniels did not say no to me, she just had to go to the bathroom,” Cory said, trying to sound as convincing as possible. It wasn’t working. 

“Have fun at the dance, sweetheart,” she said, smiling. 

“Oh, I will!” Cory exclaimed, and then walked out the door. 

 

~*~

 

The gym, now turned dance hall, was barely lit with dim fairy lights hanging from the ceiling and balloons and streamers hanging above them. Blue and purple stage lights flashed on the DJ on stage and around the room, illuminating hundreds of streamers and balloons hanging from the ceiling. The sequins on the girls' dresses and the flash of lights from people’s phones made the whole hall move with dancing light. Some Strokes song was playing loudly over the speakers as the gang entered. 

  
Zay had met his date on the front steps of the school. She was a girl named Ashley, someone the whole group vaguely knew but had never really talked to.

“Told you I wasn’t lying,” Zay said, grabbing Ashley’s hand. 

“No one said you were,” said Lucas, looking incredulously at his friend. 

“So you admit she’s real!” Zay said accusatorially. Lucas ignored this and instead turned to Riley, who was standing next to Maya and looking in awe at everything. 

“Oh my gosh, this is so cool!” she stopped and listened to the music for a little bit, bopping her head along with the punky rock song, “And this! This music is so hardcore. I’m so hardcore now! Do I have a tattoo?!” 

Riley quickly shut her eyes and held out her arm for inspection. Maya took her arm and gasped, causing Riley to gasp in turn.  

“Oh my gosh you do!”

  
“Holy crap, really?! What is it? What is it?!”

“It’s a purple unicorn jumping over a rainbow made of cupcakes!”

Riley immediately opened her eyes and looked at Maya, then her arm, and sighed, “I don’t really have a tattoo,” she said, shaking her head.

Maya smiled and laughed, booping Riley on the nose, “No, but it’s cute you thought you might for a minute.” 

Riley shrugged and turned to Lucas, “I’m hardcore, aren’t I?”

Lucas smiled, “You are if you want to be.”

  
Riley smiled back and leaned into him, allowing him to put his arm around her.

Maya then went and grabbed Farkle’s hand, “Come on lover boy, I want you to show me your moves,” she said, pulling him along with her as she headed towards the dance floor. 

“I got moves,” Farkle said confidently for everyone, then quickly whispered into Maya’s ear, “I don’t really got moves.”  


Maya rolled her eyes, “It’s okay, I’ll show you what to do,” she said, and they melted into the crowd, beginning to dance to the music. 

Riley and Lucas followed after them, then Zay and his date.  

A couple more songs played after, songs with trilling singers over a heavy bass. The whole time Maya and Farkle got closer and closer together, a certain chaperone’s focus being largely held on Riley and Lucas. They dared how close they could get again and again, one minute a foot apart, then half, then about an inch. Maya was unsurprisingly a good dancer and Farkle managed to hold his own. Maya was pleasantly surprised and for the first time in her life dared to see what her dancing could do to a boy. 

The answer was a lot. By the third song Farkle looked like he was about to have a heart attack, every time she turned around after having danced close against Farkle, her back just barely grazing his chest, she saw his eyes looking a little dazed and his mouth parted, whether it was just from exertion or from the way she swayed just barely against him, who was to say?

By the time the third song was over she was about to suggest getting some punch just to give the boy a break when a slow song began to play, immediately sending the crowd of boys and girls into a kind of stupor as people began to latch on to their partners and move languidly on the dance floor. 

Maya and Farkle stood quietly together for a moment, looking at one another as the soft notes of a piano played in the background. Quietly and without prompting, the two moved to each other. Maya threw her arms around Farkle’s neck and he pulled her in by her waist, the two clung to each other silently and began moving to the flow of violin strings and a smoky voice that began to flood the hall. 

Maya’s head rested gently on Farkle’s chest, her breath began to come and go in time with his heartbeat. Her head felt light as a feather, her chest felt like it was anchored to his, there was a string between the two of them- tethering them together. That ocean she so often had felt lost amidst no longer seemed to pull her down beneath the light. They buoyed each other, kept each other from sinking.

In the month that had passed since they had gotten together, Maya had realized Farkle needed her the same way she needed him. Far too often, she’d thought that having another person would make you sink, but with Farkle, she felt light as air. She felt as though nothing could hurt her. Everything would be okay as long as they were together. 

Maya felt the bright lights of the dance hall against her eyelids, saw them dimmed behind her closed eyes. For a moment, she could barely hear the music that flooded around them. In her mind, there was only light, and Farkle’s warmth and the solidness and comfort of his arms around her. She thought she could be left there forever and be content. A song change interrupted this though, a subtle one, from a calming piano and smoky, sultry singer to a twangy guitar and a sweet, gentle voice.

Maya went to look back up at Farkle as the sweet, upbeat song played and people danced around them. He was looking down at her, that word splayed out in the light shining in his eyes, waiting on the cusp of his parted lips, in the way his arms wrapped around her and his hand laid gently against her mid-back. Love. 

Without another thought she went to kiss him, Farkle's eyes closed as she went to do so but her lips hovered just over his lips, his breath tickling her lips. 

In a moment of pure delight she spoke, “I love you.” 

“I love you, too,” he replied without hesitation.  

Their lips finally met, their arms wrapped each other closer than before, and they were happy. Surrounded by the warmth and glow of their friends, the music, and one another. Never had either of them felt such peace before.

Between them was the key to one another’s happiness, to their freedom. They had both been scared, but love had set them free. 


End file.
